Thank goodness for Tylenol.  Yum.

 

It was all going along just fine.  We were eating all the yummy food, drinking all the delicious milk and, for the most part, avoiding too much splatter on the walls, ceiling, windows and floor.

 Toward the end of the meal Tessa looked up at her dad who was feeding her, and as plain as day said, “All done!” while giving the perfect sign for “all done”.

For a second Chad and I just stared at her.

“Did she just say ‘All done’?”  I asked him.

“I think so.”

There were a couple of spoonfuls left of her fruit and so he said, “Should I try?”

“Sure.  Test the Tessa Hypothesis.”

SMACK!  Onto the floor went the spoon and a huge glop of banana-orange medley.

I guess she was all done.  Wow.  It just gets crazier each day. 

Where did all the funny stories go?

Why in the world aren’t there any recent posts?

Mommy is busy at work. 

There is light at the end of the working tunnel, though…

Sorry for the delay.

We walked and babbled about, you know, baby stuff.  Worked on getting some MORE teeth. Wore our pants on our heads. 

 

You know, just hung out.

When a person or a car whizzes past we ask, “Where did it go?”  “Where did it go?” And we put are hands in the air and shrug our shoulders.  It’s quite possibly as cute as the Mackenzie-patented “touchdown”!

These hats were Daddy’s birthday present from the girls.  They are toddler size, not baby size, so we can wear them for years and years to come…Here, Nora poses in style.

Tessa had to take a break from window gazing to check out the score…

Oh no!  We’re losing.  So we started to wonder…

“Who in the world is this pitcher?”  “Where did the Royals score go?”

Don’t look sissy.  It isn’t pretty.

But I’m glad we are.

And I’m glad I’m doing it with you.

Love you, Chad.

It’s “toddler” once they start toddlin’, right? 

We’re walkin’, yes siree…

And we talkin’, ’bout you and me…

Let’s get ready to….

TUMBLE!!!!!!!!

Word.

They’re pretty good at it too.  Nora was the first to take off about a week ago.  And then this weekend Tessa decided she better catch up.

What’s so cute is that they KNOW they’re walking and they are so proud of themselves.  You can see it in their laugh and in their eyes.

swam 2 little fishes and a mommy fishy too

swim said the mommy fish swim if you can
so they swam and they swam all over the dam

oomp boomp dittum dattum wattum choo
oomp boomp dittum dattum wattum choo
oomp boomp dittum dattum wattum choo

and they swam swam all over the dam.

Tonight begins Lesson 1.  Stay tuned…

Adjusting to being a parent in my mind has been more difficult in some respects than any other change I have encountered in my life.  I say “in some respects” because there is a certain degree of necessity that kicks in upon giving birth that doesn’t seem to give you much time to think about anything because your so busy doing all the time.  But the adjustment to thinking about myself as a mother–as a parent–is a leap that is unparalleled.  It’s difficult to know what to expect, how you will feel, how you will react, whether you are doing the right thing for your child, your children…

I guess I am sometimes struck by how different my love is for them as opposed to what I thought it would be like.  Although I have always instinctively loved Nora and Tessa, I didn’t expect automatically to fall deeply and passionately in love with them.  How can you fall in love with the idea of something?  How can I love someone that I don’t know?  So, I knew my love would be a process–the mulling over of each quiet moment with a baby snuggled in my arms, the moments when my heart aches over bumped noggin or a fever, the hilarious moments when their is laughter for just the sake of laughter.

When we bought this house exactly two years ago we make some updates, painted, put in new carpet–we made it our home.  It feels like my home.  It’s mine. 

But, when we had the girls, almost a year ago, they didn’t feel like mine.  Even though they are our very own flesh and blood.  Even though we make every decision for them, about them, with the thought of them in our hearts.  Even though they are are on my mind every morning and the very last sweet moment of every night…

 

I have realized that they are not mine.  Rather they are passing through–through us, with us, along side us.  They are here to join us on this ride.  And as my love for them grows in each moment of each day, so does the realization that they are mine, but they are not. 

I am still learning from Nora and Tessa, but this much I know is true, as so perfectly articulated by Bill Staines’ Child of Mine…

You have the hands that will open up the doors
You have the hopes this world is waiting for
You are my own, but you are so much more
You are tomorrow on the wing,

Child of mine.

I love you Nora.  I love you Tessa.